Life and everything

2012-01-22T01:12:00.000-08:00

Hi finally back on blogger. Just too busy with my work life that i forgot i actually have a blog. Oh well. Work is getting a lil too boring ever since the change of manager. I want Hari back awww man. Exactly another one and half month till i stop working so let's just do this. I can do this.

I can't wait for tuesday to come! Finally another meet up with the girls hehe yay yay! & School's results gonna be out in 8 days time. Hais i should really stop worrying about it. Whatever school, whatever environment, i have to get used to it. All the best to myself, har har har.

Ok till we meet again, blogger. Happy Chinese New Year's Eve to all cinones. hahahaha k bye

2012-01-01T05:08:00.000-08:00

Finally a meet up last thursday. A simple one though but full of madness, ahhh as usual! We are not ourselves if we aren't kecoh. Thank you for day, next up: Poly Open house. Looking forward to it cos it's with you girls and not anyone else. Hehehehe alahai kenapa aku sweet? K bye.

2011-12-18T05:35:00.000-08:00

I'm so disheartened with the fact that i can't attend the bbq cum ipin's birthday celebration! I really wanna go haizzzzzz why work why! Nevermind, at least i'll get to meet the girls during the poly open house. It's been so long since i last met them...haha no actually it was a few weeks ago but still!! 1 hour is never enough because we need more than just 1 hour to hang out and just talk about life. Meet up soon girls, rara keai miss you girls very very much <3

Tomorrow marks my third week of work. In just three weeks, i have to face so many challenges but i know Allah's with me always. I thought being a cashier wasn't this hard but it's harder than i thought. God, i hate being a cashier so much. Thank God i have a really nice manager. I wonder where can i ever get this kind of manager when i finally step into my work life in the future. God bless you, boss! I'mma survive this job, insyaAllah! Anyway, talking about work, my pay is like in 2 weeks time!!! I CAN'T WAIT ONLY GOD KNOWS HOW EXCITED I AM TO FINALLY FEEL MY OWN WORKING MONEH HAHAHAHA ooooppss sorry for the caps lock :P

Ah bye la my blog is boring anyway.

2011-12-09T03:11:00.000-08:00

Give thanks to Allah.

Anyway hi blogger, long time no see. Now that it's my off day today, i decided to do a little update here. Well it's been a week i guess since i started work. Alhamdulillah met really nice people at work and it's never awkward. I realized how much i miss school cos work is so tiring! I've never felt so lethargic before, lol apart from studying for O levels la (haha wth) Hmmm so far, i really enjoy work and insyaAllah may these feelings last.

2011-11-26T23:31:00.000-08:00

I've been going out quite often actually but yesterday was a must because it's Mum's 46th birthday cum 18 years anniversary. Had our dinner together over at Burger King. I mean the last time we ate Burger King as a whole family was really long time ago, at IKEA's. I can't remember how old i was back then but yeah.

Happy birthday mum. You know, you're the only woman i love the most in this world and no one else can ever replace you. Thank you for everything <3

Work starts tomorrow!!! I'm so nervous and very excited at the same time. Ya Allah, please make it easy on me, insyaAllah ameen.

2011-11-23T01:23:00.000-08:00

Had lots of fun with ze gurls yesterday. Went for job hunting and alhamdulillah we secured a job! (ermmm except for fiza la since she don't like retail) Can't wait to start actually but only God knows how i'm feeling in the inside....omg. Anyway yesterday it felt like as if we walked the whole of Singapore when it's actually just City Hall. I mean really, i've never experienced such leg aches before, lol apart from the 2.4km run in school la hehe. Thank you for the day girls, another meet up coming soon fosho! We've got sentosa, karaoke, swimming.......wow so exciting!

I'll be very busy once work starts so i'll find time to update this space. I mean, yeah no promises! Adios readers (if there's any) lol.

Oh! before i forget, how can you not love Singapore, you tell me? #kaubodohpe

Told ya! Beautiful scenery can be found like anywhere. It's either you take a camera and snap it or just leave it and walk away, hehehehe..

2011-11-20T09:27:00.001-08:00

17 November 2011, definitely a night to remember. You ladies and gentlemen looked so good that night. I wish i could invent my own time machine, or just a special watch so that i could stop the time from moving. I miss my classmates so much (not the tony and gang of cos!).

Speaking of which, thank god the food wasn't disappointing. The performances too. It was a joyful night i would say. We laughed a lot, especially at Miss Lee's speech. So gonna miss that old woman, hehe.

I still can't believe my 5 years of secondary school life just ended. Oh dear, just look at how time flies!! I remember getting all excited about grad night, & now it's over! Sigh, eventually life goes on. No more turning back. I love the school, the teachers and the friends i've made throughout the 5 years. Just....thank you everyone, for the wonderful memories made.

Lastly, special thanks to my lovely ladies! School will definitely be a bore without these 5 ladies here. Will miss you ladies very much. No more annoying & funny moments in school....this is funny but you ladies were actually what i looked up to going to school. No words can actually describe how much i cherish the 5 of you. Our secondary school life just ended, but our friendship will never end.

Much love.

2011-11-14T18:30:00.000-08:00

Holla!!! it feels good to be back huh. O's are finally over and you guys got no idea how satisfied, we o-level students felt when the clock strikes 3pm just now. Alhamdulillah, my 5 years of education in a secondary school just ended. Will definitely miss every second spent in school though. From the forever kecoh lessons to the gugu gaga over good looking teachers and finally our preparations for O's, for example night study. Wow time flies too fast, TOO FAST. In just a blink of an eye, i'm 18 next year. Unbelievable but that's life.

I certainly have to go for job hunting since i'll not want to rot at home during the 6 months holiday. I need to work and at least feel the satisfaction when i get my own pay. Truthfully, i've never work before in my whole entire life. This is going to be the first and definitely not the last, hehe.

So our graduation night is this coming Thursday. Can't wait for tomorrow since i'll be out the whole day to shop for my grad night outfits. Adios bitchacos!

2011-09-19T21:06:00.000-07:00

Had a really great day spent with my NA kids. Love you guys to bits and pieces and i really hope we wouldn't forget each other once we ended our O's. I mean, what's life without such lovely friends like you people right? May Allah shower his blessings upon you good people.

Night study's gonna attack soon. Let's do our very best, peeps! Get it done and over with. I SMELL FREEDOM! hehehe

2011-09-13T06:56:00.000-07:00

I may be a bitch but at least, i'm not cheap or should i say..... free of charge? Heh, i may be smiling in school but actually i've killed you million times in my head. Jyeah, i hate you & so is my girls!

2011-09-07T06:31:00.000-07:00

A happy raya i would say but i miss ramadhan so much. It's already the second week of raya (gosh how time flies!) and my family is not done with our visiting. Gosh, we sure need to rush a little because my prelims is just next week, oh great. Sometimes i just don't feel the excitement of getting myself ready to get my collection because i know the thought of prelims and O's are haunting me :( I wonder, what's with all these education thingy? Doesn't make any sense at all -.-" my chem suck, my eng too. & comb.humans? that's not even in my list.

Apart from hari raya, we celebrated our teachers' day too! It was a joyful day spent with my lovely girls. You girls rock my socks, ahhhhh k. heh

& here's a big THANK YOU to my one and only malay language teacher. The one who has taught us for 5 consecutive years. I know that without your help, i wouldn't have done so well for my O's. May Allah shower his blessings upon you, cikgu nor. We'll miss you, very much :'(

Oh! before i forget, my birthday coming so yeah, a DSLR as a present will do. Heh k pergi tunggu lama-lama farah.

2011-08-22T06:31:00.001-07:00

Exactly what i thought. Tumblr, you're so cool and i like you.

2011-08-18T05:49:00.000-07:00

Alhamdulillah for today, dear Allah. Thank you because you're always there to listen. I'm already thankful enough for my results. I don't know how to repay You, ya Allah. You're just so amazing, ya Allah. Thank you once again.

Now it's time to focus on my weaker subjects. Like maths, eng and science. Errr comb.humans? I will try okay, hah. I'm aiming a 5 for English, 2 for D&T, 4 for Maths and 5 for Science. A D7 for comb.humans will be good enough though but still, i'm doubting. Well, i really don't know haha.

People hurt me, and they think it's a joke. Wow, what is that?

2011-08-15T05:57:00.000-07:00

Geylang was awesome! Especially with your family members. I waited for i dont know how many days just to get here. Finally bought my raya clothes and it's not just one or two, but three! How awesome is that. I'm just a lil excited for this year's raya but still the big O's just have to spoil everything huh, tsk. It would be nice if mum and dad were to plan another geylang outing for the family, confirm guarantee plus chop I will look forward to it.

Saturday, four people were supposed to go but ended up with just the two of us. Had kfc for break fast and then trained down to lakeside to catch the ndp celebrations over at CC. What a typical day spent. We lost our mood because our stomach was being a bitch so we went back home straight. It'll be great if more people were to join, but... ah nevermind.

Mum being a pain in the neck. I don't know what i do wrong but whenever i talked to her nicely, she always have something to shut me off. haizzzz god bless you, mum.

2011-08-11T08:28:00.000-07:00

Seriously, Y U NO FACEBOOK? Gah, i'm going crazzzzzy.

I know it's impossible ah, but you're too cute to be true man, hah.

I know i sound so alkjsdlakajhsaslalkslsk.. but i dont care.

I'm just gonna have fun, fun and fun. Ah yeah right mahh foot, the big O's running after me and yet i still can admit such thing. It's already August for goodness sake and i'm not even getting used to the O's period. Just slap me, someone. A tight one indeed.

2011-08-09T08:04:00.000-07:00

The concert was great, i think so far the items prepared were better off than last year's but oh well, the teachers just have to find something mean to spoil our mood at the very end. Really, i hate the school now. Still very angry and pissed, pfffft.

On a brighter note, it's already been 1 week and 2 days since we muslims, fast. Oh well, how time flies! Dear ramadhan, please stay this way for like another 21 more days? Heh, insyaAllah.

Anywayssss, can i dream about tyz again? can i, can i, can i?! He's too good to be true.

2011-08-01T08:02:00.000-07:00

I've caused people so much hurt. Now it's time for me to sit back and pray for their happiness, without me being part of it. Ramadhan, please be good. I'm going to control my temper, and be patience with the people around me.

InsyaAllah, Alluhumma Ameen.

2011-07-29T01:26:00.000-07:00

Thank you. At least for dropping by and commented, although it hurts. Well, i'm just used to the pain you see, so i don't really mind. I'm done, so once again.. thank you.

I shall focus on the upcoming test next week. I've got no time to hate people who's been hurting me cos i'm too busy loving the people who simply draw a smile on my face.

Keep calm and Ramadan Mubarak muslim friends!

2011-07-02T20:26:00.000-07:00

"Apa yang tinggal hanyalah doaku padamu Tuhan, pasrahku hanya kamu yang menentukan." This song gives so much impact on me, on my 'love' life. To add on, the singer... yes can you believe that this singer reminds me of you? Grrrr annoying much.

2011-06-29T04:51:00.000-07:00

Don't you think it's really awkward when you have an eye contact with that someone for a few freaking times in just one day? Err, i've always felt that way and i can't help it. It's like that 'awkward moment' will be popping out of a sudden, with no good reason. So annoying because i sure as hell do not want to remember a thing but some things just made me.

Sigh, how i wish i wasn't dumb enough last time. How i wish we could still be friends. How i wish we could talked like friends and act like nothing has ever happened between us. How i wish you could forgive me and start talking to me. How i wish you'll talk to me like how you talk to my friends. How i wish i could love you with all my heart without you knowing. How i wish i could turn back time and erase all the bad deeds i've done to you. How i wish i wasn't a bitch(like what you called me). How i wish i could proved to you that i've changed. How i wish i could make you feel the same way as i do. How i wish i was pretty enough. How i wish i could go to school without faking a smile and pretending that everything's okay when in actual fact, it has never been like that. How i wish i could make you laugh at my jokes and smile at my silly moments. How i wish i could hang out with you and just talk about everything under the sun/moon. How i wish i was the 'girl' you fell in love with in the past. How i wish what i dreamt that day is going to be true one day. Ya Allah, please grant my wishes. I'm human, humans can't simply get away from mistakes. Forgive me, ya Allah.

Hmm, and lastly.. i hope you'll hop into my blog and read this. Err and maybe feel a pinch. Well, I just wanna let you know that you never really left my mind. You're there, and you'll always be there. Whether you like it or not, i can't get you out of my mind. I just hope that i'm strong enough to get through everyday, even if takes a million years to pretend, i'll do it. Yeah, i'm very good at pretending and lying too. Hmm, just so you know that's me.

I miss you, so much that it hurts.

2011-06-21T01:44:00.000-07:00

2 years, 9 months. So what's new? I cried, a lot last night because memories came gushing through my mind. Just wanna let you know that my feelings hasn't change. It's like 1 year 5 months since we last talked. Yes people might as well take that i'm such a fool, like why am i still counting down the days that meant nothing to you at all. I don't have the reasons with me.

FML, really. I'm such a foolish, stubborn, little bitch who can't seemed to move on.

2011-06-20T02:49:00.000-07:00

Hi hey ho. You can't get enough of me right? Hah, i'm just saying oh well.

Was supposed to have a meet-up with my girls and go kite-flying at east coast last saturday but i ended up at some wedding function with my family members. Well, fretting about what happen isn't going to help. Glad that i had hilarious moments with the cousins. We're so cool like that, heh.

Oh! & the next wedding function i'm going to attend is in october baby! i'm so e-x-c-i-t-e-d like #@#$%@#^^$% because my 'sister' is finally getting married. I can't wait for that day to come, i can't imagine how gorgeous she'll turn out to be on her special day. Hehehehehe kay diam.

By the way, school's reopening soon and guess what? Hah, as usual.. my homework's never going to be done. I feel like doing SS, been a while since i do something related to SS although it was and still never going to be my favorite subject. Shall get my ass off the computer chair, i've been procrastinating since the start of june hols anyway. I know, i'm such a lazy ass girl.

2011-06-18T08:20:00.000-07:00

What a strange world we've experienced. Well, no this is not the end. More to come, i shall just expect the unexpected. Apart from that....

i miss these bunch of cool kids! & of course not to forget, my annoying 5N2.

2011-06-17T23:20:00.000-07:00

The greatest lesson i've learned in life is,

- to never invest deep feelings for someone. Never hope that they’ll love you the way you want them to. Never expect that those sweet gestures and sweet words are true. It is because eventually, everything becomes a past. Sooner or later, they’ll just drop you off and will leave you nothing. So train yourself to let go of the things you fear to lose. So that when they’re gone, you won’t feel dumb and pathetic all along.

2011-06-11T03:36:00.000-07:00

Even if i'm perfect, people is gonna judge me anyway.

I can really forget about going out and having fun with the girls. People at home just dont understand. Their perspective of me living is to study, be at home, study, be at home. Now i feel like i'm in need of freedom. Like what's the point of grounding me? Haiz i dont know what to say. When i feel like saying something, they always find a way to bring my words down. I better keep quiet, or maybe just write down my feelings on my diary. I feel better that way.

Sometimes i wish committing suicide isn't a sin. But Allah, you're with me right? I know.

2011-06-09T03:25:00.000-07:00

Well, trust me. 5 days in KL is never gonna be enough. Heh, i dont know about 1 week. I had the most extremely fun holidays! It's just us, the family and cousins. Explore the whole KL like we've never done it before. Now we're like some pro already, me gusta!

Theme park! That was what i've been looking forward to. After a few years of trying out everything except the roller coaster, we braved ourselves to try it out this time round. Nah, mum didn't try because she's too afraid of height. Well well well, haha. I swear it was one of the awesome rides ever! Two rides, one go. I is brave girl, nyehehehehe

I remember on the second night, i had the most unusual dream. I dont know how to feel after i woke up. I wish it happened in reality. Haizzzzz i want that dream, i want to dream of that dream again. Everything felt real =/

Apart from the holiday trip, i miss 2 d&t lessons!!!!! yes, it's a big deal to me yo. I'm so sad because some of my friends are done with their artefact and presentation board. GRRRRRR!

2011-06-01T07:13:00.000-07:00

I've had enough actually. I've been all silent towards my feelings because i chose to put it aside whenever i'm with my friends but when i'm alone, especially at night.. the problems came one after another haunting me down. I want to be happy again. I dont want to pretend, pretend to be happy. For once, i want to feel lively. Like when i see you around, i'll just smile for no reason. Not like now. Like i have to smile, laugh and pretend that it's okay and i've forgotten all my problems. I dont want that.

Allah, why must it be me? & why must it be him? It's going to be 3 years and nothing's change on my side.

2011-05-26T02:31:00.001-07:00

& yeah, i hope you you you & you know.

2011-05-21T21:52:00.000-07:00

Ya Allah..
it hurts when I have to let go the things I really love.
it hurts when I have to lose something that I really want.
it hurts, Allah.
it hurts..

but believe me, Ya Allah..
I will feel hurt most when I know that I have hurt You..
it hurt most, Allah..
believe me..
believe me….

I realize that I can never live without Your mercy.
I realize that I can never smile without the concious that You are pleased with me.
I realize that I can never lead my life if You are unhappy with me.

I am sorry.
I am really really sorry.
For I have neglected You for long time.
For I have loved others more than I should love You.
For I have prioritized others more than I should.

Even then..
You still gives me food to eat when I am not supposed to eat what I shouldn’t eat
You still gives me eyes to see when I am not supposed to see what I shouldn’t see
You still gives me ears to hear when I am not supposed to hear what I shouldn’t hear
You still gives me skin to touch when I am not supposed to touch what I shouldn’t touch
You still give the air I’m breathing now when I have done tonnes of mistakes..

How can someone not fall for You?
You are very nice Ya Allah.
You are very kind Ya Allah.
You are great Ya Allah.

but I forget..
I’m so occupied with this world.
I’m so busy with my life.
I’m so so so busy about myself.

I can never forgive myself if this were to happen again.
how can I do that to You Allah, I’m such an arrogant slave.
I’m not thankful to You.
I feel embarrased Ya Allah. I’m embarrased, Ya Allah!

but please Ya Allah..
soon one day I will be meeting You, ya Allah.

Forgive me on that day ya Allah.
Have mercy on that day ya Allah.
Shower your blessings on that day ya Allah.
That is my only wish, ya Allah.

- Poem taken from iloveAllaah.com

2011-05-20T08:50:00.000-07:00

I'm forever unsatisfied with my blogskin. Hahahaha whatever about that. What a bad friday for me :( i almost cried ya know. So many things happened in just one day. How come? But eng prelim oral made my day. Wait actually someone made my day in the morning but hehehe, i'm too shy to type it out here :P Okay, speaking of oral! YES, i'm sooooo glad i did well. I talked well, i spoke well. & my aim of not getting ms lee as my invigilator just shattered like that. Hahaha, i got her but that's okay. I'm used to her so it's not so awkward then.

I smile throughout the whole conversation because i was very confident with what i was gonna say. Damn, my cheeks hurt a lot. Well, i love the feeling of satisfaction. I wish just now was O-level. But there's a little hope. Hoping to do well for my prelims since MYE was a killer -.-" InsyaAllah.

Was just browsing through someone's photo album and there you are.. I dont like seeing your face. I mean, i feel better. Much more better when you're not around. I feel like that's the real me. Nonetheless, i still smile when i saw you in any picture. With your silly pose, you're just so adorable to not looked at. Sigh, i think... i think i wasn't over you yet.

& oh! it's the 21st tomorrow. It's over and yet, i still set my alarm on this date. No motive but yeah, i've always wanted to remember this date for the rest of my life. No joke.

I'm a loser, i know.

2011-05-18T01:19:00.001-07:00

Hi i wanna cry. My MYE results going down the drain. I hate myself, i hate my results, i hate everything. Not a good day definitely. I wish i was as smart as shanon. I can also forget about getting a DPA. Throwing that chance far far away.

Yes, FML. Really.

2011-05-12T05:30:00.000-07:00

Bowling was fun together with the girls and a few guys. Damn it was my first time so pardon me, i suck. Hahahaha but it was a great experience though. But the paying part was a joke. Jurong superbowl, you cheat our feelings mannnn.

After bowling, me nisa and rahmat didnt wanna go home so we went to lake park to stroll. Above is some pictures taken mostly by nisa. No great skills but i'll keep trying, you mad? HAHAHA, 5 days of school holidays. Great, just great. We're in need of it so badly, but sadly MYE suck. My aim of getting 14 points is flying like a g6 now. Bye.

2011-05-07T09:53:00.000-07:00

Hi band members, i miss you guys already. Remember how happy we all were? I miss those happy moments, really. All the best in everything you do, band members! I really do hope the school's gonna organize syf gala this year so we could play our syf piece together all over again. Allah, please grant my wish.

2011-05-05T02:54:00.001-07:00

I'm just too lazy to elaborate. I will take the whole day to type everything out, so now just let the pictures do the talking..

Had a family day out and i swear it was one of the best sunday's!! So the next day was ina's birthday and we ordered pizza the night before and ordered the cake the next day. It was blessful monday i would say. Thank you, Allah. Alhamdulillah for everything.

So people's been talking about how hard MYE is. So far, three papers down and a few more to go. I've been cracking my brain for SS but i still don't have that bit of confidence in me. I can really go fly kite la, seriously. Comb humans confirm like shit. Die farah, die.

2011-05-01T07:33:00.001-07:00

YES, the 5th month of 2011. It scares the shit out of me because it's already may and i have not been doing anything, i repeat eh, not been doing ANYTHING about my studies. Why farah whyyy. I freaked out whenever i see my friends talking about their revisions at home, and me? Nothing. I'm just in my relax mode and god, i need to wake up! Seriouslyyyy

Bye la, i hate you farah. I hate you.

2011-04-29T21:42:00.000-07:00

Somebody wants you,

somebody needs you,

somebody dreams about you every single night.

somebody can't breate without you, it's lonely.

somebody hopes someday you will see,

that somebody's me.

2011-04-24T05:46:00.000-07:00

I'm not okay today, and i might not be tomorrow but i'm going to try a lot harder from now on. I don't want to feel this way anymore. I don't want this nothingness that has tangled around my heart.

This empty void inside me can only be filled with perfection: Allah.

2011-04-23T06:01:00.000-07:00

My saturday is the best so far!! I think spending time with your family is one of the best things in life. Despite being busy with school, i managed to laugh my ass off with my mum and dad. The lovely people on earth, the ones i never really wanna lose. We finally bought a new camera for ourselves. I'm the happiest girl on earth i tell you! It's so hard to persuade Ayah to buy a new camera because he insisted to change the old camera's batteries. Well, we psycho-ed him like dont know what and finally he surrendered. Yes, love the new 14 megapixel camera! & i can't wait for our next family vacation. Apart from that, i can also start practicing my skills on photography. Yeah, freaking excited! <3 Psss, you dont need a dslr to be a photographer, just a proper camera will do, hehehehe.

I'm off to eat some ice-cream now, just to cool the inside of me. Ciaozz

2011-04-19T07:50:00.000-07:00

It's going to be a hectic week ahead. Well, MYE is just next week. I wish i could ignore that fact but yeah, this is the life. Maths was fun today, both lesson and remedial. I think i know the key to collect the mood when it comes to maths, but i shall keep it to myself then. I dont feel like sharing :P I think everyone's sick and tired of malay but i shall keep myself in line for less than a month, since Malay O-level is like on the 30th of may. Ahhh crap crap crap. Suddenly i can feel the stress gushing to me!! Oh Allah, please make all of us strong enough to face times like this.

"You'll never change and i'll keep forgetting that"

2011-04-13T05:40:00.000-07:00

& THIS, was definitely unbelievable *immitates ms tan's voice*

It was a break through. We managed to be with each other, through thick and thin. It was all worth it, with all the scoldings, crying, waking up as early as 6am to practice. It was worth the effort. I'm so proud that each and everyone of you believed in being successful. We did it! We got our long-waited silver, our desired medal. It was a great experience to be with you guys during SYF'11 and i couldn't imagine myself i didn't make it up to sec 5. I wouldn't have felt what you guys felt just now.

SILVER SILVER SILVER! i still couldn't believe it. Oh & according to amalina; "CALEB.DID U EVEN GET SILVER WHEN YOU WERE IN THE BAND?? NO RIGHT? THEN? WE GOT 3 SILVERS,1 GOLD AND A FREAKING SILVER FOR SYF. in your face" I mean really, you just gotta shut the eff up. You're no better compared to us so yeah, just because you're in SAF band now, it doesnt mean you're so great already. Oh please, omg.

I'm gonna mug mug mug like a hardcore!! YES!

2011-04-10T05:49:00.000-07:00

Pictures credits: Qash.

Theatre was a blast!! I want to watch some thing similar to that once again. I saw people crying, lol that includes me actually. I didnt wanna cry but as soon as the 'Bila Cinta' song appeared, i started tearing up. What the hell, i thought to myself. I swear the three kids behind nisa, muhaiminah and me is superbly annoying. they can't shut their mouth up because there's always something that would wanna comment on. Haizzz luckily i'm patient enough that i didnt turn back to give them the can-you-shut-up stare.

Headed to nearest macs to have our lunch, err late-lunch i think because it was already 5 when we reached macs. Snap here and there and we sure had fun on a saturday night! I super love sight-seeing singapore when it comes to night. With the lights everyday, it's beautiful. The IR building is so amazing at night. Somehow the lightings reminds me of hong kong. How much i miss hong kong.

2 more days to syf!! i'm excited and nervous at the same time, hehehehehehe

2011-04-08T05:43:00.000-07:00

Pictures credit: Nisa

Didn't expect this year's sports day to be the best sport's day ever. The moment i stepped into the stadium, that's when the memories i had with the 4N2 peeps came gushing through my thoughts. Oh, how much i miss all of them. Some even came down today, i was glad they still managed to make their way just to spend some time with the sec 5's. Seri came down, finally! After what seemed like hundred years of not seeing each other, we finally meet! Allah, its the best feeling ever when i got the chance to hug her very tightly. Kecoh, is the word i shall describe for today. We shout shout shout, we snap snap snap, we laugh laugh laugh. I swear i felt a little love for my own classmates.

The sun's scorching hot in the morning and everyone started bringing out their umbrella. Hahaha i saw guys doing that too. Oh, i dont know why but i find some guys in the class very handsome today lol. Even, jess and nisa agreed with me. It's sucha waste adrian didnt snapped our photos with ipin properly, haizzzzzz hahahaha.

It's gonna be a long day tomorrow. Band in the morning, theatre in the afternoon. I swear i'm gonna chiong like nobody business tomorrow but i'm hoping for a good day. Band members, see you tomorrow. Its a little awkward today because i didnt go to school as early as 6am to have our band practice with the band members. I miss you guys already, hehehehe <3

2011-04-07T07:06:00.000-07:00

I think i will miss these girls the moment i step out of the school, together with my O-level cert. It was a success for me, going to school as early as 6am just to have our short band practice with ms dorean tan. I gotta admit that this week's really a hectic week. I almost couldn't find the right time to revise for my test. Finally done with all the test for this week. There's vector test on monday. oh god, is this what you call life? No, more like a living hell.

Sport's day tomorrow. Not looking forward but i hope for a better tomorrow. & WHY IS THIS YEAR'S SYF SO STRICT? my heart's beating so fast right now.

2011-04-05T09:16:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was rather a busy monday i would call. So busy that i realized i dislikes everything or whatever i'm doing in school. So stressed up with both CCA and studies and i couldn't juggle up the two of them equally. Sigh, why must sec 5 life be this difficult? I mean, am i the only one who's feeling like this or what? Homeworks after homeworks. I can see them piling up on one another. Test after test, in A WEEK. Just imagine, you've got so many test to revise on and all of them are in the same week. Allah, now i know how it feels like to be an O-level student. I'm experiencing what they have already experienced long ago. Seriously, i can't wait to get over it. Syf is taking too much of my time, or should i say all of the O's and N's students' time. Be strong people, although i wrote all this like as if i've despair. But no! that's impossible, as long as Allah is with me, i'm on the right path. Be with me, and oh, my friends too, Allah.

Have i told you that this week is really kind of exciting? KIND OF. The thought of having 'tons' of test this week makes my mood fly like a G6. Kay lame. I dont know i should feel excited because there's sports day and theatre(sp?) or be disappointed because there's 3 test going on. One test down, two more! Jiayou!!

"I dont wanna live in regrets. Please at least prove to me that you're worth loving. Not by me, but by a girl who deserves you more than i do."

2011-04-03T23:00:00.000-07:00

I used to be so addicted to this song and guess what? I'm starting to fall in love with it all over again. Her songs are just too addictive and i can be listening to it again and again without getting sick and tired. Here's a picture of her without any emo make up on, hehehe

Her eyesssss <3 Well, i think she defines true beauty. I can see it in her eyes, already. Oh & the fact that she's older than rihanna, katy perry and lady gaga amazed everyone in tumblr! OMG seriously, she's younger than her age. Ahhhh this is much more amazing <3

2011-04-02T08:01:00.000-07:00

Overdued pictures up, like finally. I find it so hard to upload pictures nowadays. Its either i'm too lazy or .... yeah just lazy i think :P The best girls/siblings on earth. Love you all <3

Hmm so, band exchange wasn't what i expected it to be. Even Nolvin agreed that it doesn't look like a band exchange at all. It's like one band after another, played for each other. I almost fell asleep but i know it isn't nice to do so. The band played horribly and terribly for the first time and ms tan was so disappointed. Even mr er too. Haizzzz we got scolded and after that, we did really well compared to the first one. I mean, come on band, you don't need second chance to do your really best. SYF isn't like thaaaaat. It's like you've got to do the best of out the first chance. No more turning back. you wouldn't want to leave the stage and cry because you didn't do well, right? I mean, i know as the day passed by and the feelings you get when you actually know that SYF is around the corner. I feel you guys, really. What you guys really need right now is just confidence. Dont break down so easily, lovely band members. I believe in miracles, you guys have to, too.

It sucks to realize that SYF is just the week after this coming week. SIGH can i cryyyy now.

Anyway, i posted something on my wall and its goes like this, "dont april fool's me tomorrow, i tell you. I will punch your face" and in the end i WAS fooled. By who? Hah, the know-it-all guy, fareed. WAS SO PISSED OFF LA. How can i easily get tricked by something that's so small, without even thinking that its april fool at the same time. Haizzzzz but seriously i automatically laughed when harith's the victim. Rabak mahu lebih please!

2011-03-30T08:09:00.000-07:00

I haven’t spoken to you for nearly 2 years after you left and when I still try to, you still give me that feeling of not knowing what to say. I want to know you again, but I guess if you wanted to too, you would.

2011-03-25T10:18:00.000-07:00

"Don't tell me i'm charming la, my cheeks hurt siaaaa" hahahaha Y U SO CUTE ONE. Basically the picture above really reminds me of buzz. I mean, he's baz but buzz sounds nicer. Wait, they sound the same but ahhhh who cares. LOL! I'm not gonna put high hopes on you, i mean everyone who stays, will eventually leaves so what's the point right? I'm not mean but that's the fact.

Oh! & band played so well today. Amalina's wish came true, reaaaaaaallllllyyyyyy.

2011-03-21T05:46:00.001-07:00

It's a brand new term with lots and lots of things going on. My schedule is officially tight with band, band and band. Just that, and i'm for sure worried that i'm unable to do my revision as soon as i get back home. I mean, i'll be all tired and what i'm just gonna is lie on my bed and fall asleep. Hmm how bad can my time management be? So need to manage my time as soon as possible.

& my results isn't appealing at all. I feel like stuffing them into the rubbish bin. Ahhh especially my malay and math and english. Oh there's so many things to revise on.I can feel the pressure already and i dont think most of my classmates feel it. They're not serious at all and sometimes i feel like punching each and everyone of them for not realizing that this year is gonna be our important year. So pressurize that i feel the urge to cry sometimes. My math sucks. I need help like a lot because i missed a lot of lessons already. My mind's messed up all the time, with so many things going round and round my head. None of them is going to go away anytime soon. I think it'll be stuck in my head for the rest of the months, argh.

Alright, at least going to band lessen the burden a little bit. Music is my life, my passion. heh, i'm not obsess, i'm just really in love with music.
heh, assalamualaikum.

2011-02-27T04:38:00.000-08:00

Our last cross country, our last flag day. How sadddddddd can that be ahhh. I wish this world turns a little slower because i wouldn't wanna end everything just like that. I seriously need a life. It's so dull that sometimes i don't feel like i actually have one.

Hmm say whaaaaaaaaaat? It's monday tomorrow :((((

2011-02-24T08:11:00.000-08:00

I simply hate it when i gave my everything and people just take me for granted. I mean, what did i do to deserve all this? Well, if it's karma, then i'm more than sure that i don't mind because i saw what i did in the past and have regretted it but this is too much, too much that i can't take it but to cry every night before i go to sleep.

Same routine everyday, fake that smile and no one will know that i'm hurting in the inside. Really need someone to console me or whatever you call that, but who? No one, but myself.

2011-02-23T01:01:00.000-08:00

WAHHHH CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? It's WEN-ZZZ-DAY already. Look how fast this week passed by. Seriously i'm not looking forward to this saturday's flag day ah please. So annoying, just thought of waking up late since the day before will be cross-country but nah-ah-ah, it's not going to happen so don't worry -.-

Skipped math remedial because WE(me and nisa) didn't wanna look at mdm wong's face. We got tired. I mean, not just we, the rest of them in my class too. What do we do to deserve such a teacher for maths. MATHS LEY!! So important and yet, the teacher's like that. Wah damn suay 5N2. But so far so good, i'm trying my VERY best to listen in class despite the guys who's always immitating her, hahaha. Thank god i've got fazira, at least it lessen my burden a little.

OH and one more thing, band sounds really good these days!! People who's always against us, is just some bunch of immature people who doesn't know anything about music. So why must we get offended by their comments? Let's just get over it, band members. WE ARE AWESOME THE WAY WE ARE. Ahhhhh, i sound like a band freak hehehe.

Photo credits: Sheytene

2011-02-20T05:52:00.000-08:00

First of all,i'd like to say that i'm addicted to the two songs above. No way, i'm not any emo shit out there. Just that i relate to the meanings found in both songs. I mean it's so sad that i can just tear up sometimes. Ahhhh i feel like a noob.

OH PSSSSTTTTT; I actually spent my weekends on doing d&t. I find it a 'miracle' because i'd dread on doing it even if i promised myself to. Now i'm done with 20 designs, hmm still deciding on which one should i choose to be the REAL design i would like to make.

Okay here comes the hardest part of all.....

& Malay, i don't feel like doing you. Peace,bye.

2011-02-16T01:42:00.000-08:00

A friend is a person to laugh and cry with, an inspiration,
Someone who lends a helping hand, though friends may not be forever,
and they may not end up together, the memories of a true friendship will
last forever. A friend is not a shadow nor a servant but someone who hold
a piece of a person in his heart. Someone who shares a smile,
Someone who brightens up your day. What makes a person a friend?
It is by saying your love will stay -Renee donna Bufete

2011-02-14T07:38:00.000-08:00

I share my problems to a certain group of people, i don't go around sharing it like it's nothing personal to me. Of course it is and i'm so proud to be able to pretend that i'm over it. Sometimes it's just me, myself and i. I'm so insecure with the things going on all around me, sigh. I keep telling myself that it's okay and that i'm used to the pain but none of it made me feel better.

It hurts me so much everyday in school but i'm gonna keep it to myself, although sometimes i feel like tearing up at one point of time and i didn't because it's awkward to be crying in front of your not-so-close-friends you know. They'll start asking why and so on. That's not really nice isn't it? Ahhh i hope i will get better in time to come. I hope this pain will slowly heal by itself and even if it left a scar, i don't mind because it reminds me of what i used to have.

Well, everyone has scars. Everyone experienced pain, i'm glad i'm not the only one.

2011-02-12T20:26:00.000-08:00

Our little princess turned six on 8 feb. She's so happy that she got a barbie doll's house as a birthday present. Adik, you oh-so cute!

Apart from that, school's been a burden to me. So much things happening in one day and whenever i got home, i don't feel like doing my homework because my eyes kept begging me to sleep. D&t is another pain in the neck and now i have yet to start on my design ideas. THIS IS SO AINT HAPPENING. I feel like dropping out of school sometimes, but to think of that.. it's not worth it after all. Well, that's just what i feel.. not like i wanna do it or something.

I wish life was easier than this. I need a break. I know i've been saying that for god knows how many times but i just can't find that one day that i can really sit back and relax. Teachers in school has been talking about O levels.. We know that, its that you're just scaring us off. That's not funny.

2011-02-06T23:05:00.000-08:00

Do you remember me? Do you remember me as the girl you talked to all the time. The girl who knew your whole life. The girl who knew your secrets. The girl who was the most important girl in your life. The girl who was always there for. The girl you left to look for someone better. The girl you never talk to. The girl you don’t care about anymore.

Remember?

2011-02-05T20:57:00.000-08:00

Sometimes, I want to open my hijab,

and show the world, that I too,
am beautiful in the people’s definition.

But, deep down here,
in my little heart,
I know that beauty is by definition, a mystery.
and it is forever more rewarding,
to be beautiful in God’s eyes.

Sometimes,
I want to wear ruffled dresses and tight jeans,
show off what I really look like,
under those baggy shirts and loosely fitted pants,
make a statement, that I too,
have a figure and worth looking at.

But, I know better,
to avoid entering the world of men’s imagination,
for I love my future husband, and I am ashamed,
what should be his, has already been unveiled by others.

Sometimes, I want to show the world,
the other side of me,
the bubblier, bolder, and crazier me.
put myself on display, for everyone to see,
to be desired, and admired upon.

But, I know that eyes are not just eyes,
seeing is not just seeing,
image and respect are gained,
shame and humility deserve a better place,

Because in the end, it is not just about me,
I carry a lot of impressions and expectations,
of what a Muslim girl should be,

I am covered by the word “Islam” the moment I walk out of my door,
So don’t be selfish girl..

Can’t you put behind your heart’s desire for something worth fighting for?

2011-02-03T05:20:00.000-08:00

O Allah, I have greatly wronged myself and no one forgives sins but You.
So, grant me forgiveness and have mercy on me.
Surely, you are Forgiving, Merciful.O Allah,
by Your Knowledge of the unseen and by Your Power over creation,
let me live if You know that life is good for me,
and let me die if You know that death is good for me.
Forgive me my sins , surely you are Forgiving, Merciful;

2011-02-02T05:27:00.000-08:00

Instead of chinese new year celebrations, it's called ethnic celebration this year. It's definitely a new kind of thing for the whole school. I love today, although i was the odd one out. Heh, i sure can't wait for Be Yourself Day, if there is any this year since mrs menon took over the school :P

Looks like i'll be spending my holidays wisely. I'll be studying my heart's out. I dont know if that's a good or a bad thing since most of my friends are gonna enjoy their holidays and i'm always the one stuck at home. Really, i need something better than this.

& when i say you looked attractive, you really were.

2011-01-31T05:18:00.000-08:00

This. Is. It.
I dont need anyone to tell me that you really have changed . By the way it is, i can already see it coming your way. You know it hurts so much for me when people say you turned into a hypocrite. Know why? because i know you weren't like that before. That is why there's this quote saying, ''people change''. & now i really mean it, that 'people' includes you.

I have my reasons to not be 'me' anymore. You have all of it, i doubt you know.

2011-01-19T01:15:00.000-08:00

This is a chapter of my life, you can't judge me just by the way you look at me. I'm no close to what you might think. This is the life, this is me. Criticizing me doesn't make you any better.

I'm close to a piece of shit right. I'm nowhere close to perfect in anyone's eyes. I've never been pretty, i've never felt pretty too. I wish life's easy as it may seems but people is making it tougher and tougher each day. People judge you by looks, people criticized you because you're fat, people hate you because you're ugly. You know what? I'm tired of all this shits happening around the world. Wait, it's my world. Why can't people like me be judge just equally the same as others, who's not exactly perfect but owned a whole package, like pretty face, pretty attitude? Life is really unfair to me. I don't know how to feel sometimes. People criticized me as if the words they've said isn't hurting at all. As if i looked like i don't give a damn about it, of course i do. When i think about it at night, i cried myself to sleep.<

I'm glad i have wonderful friends who still care about my feelings, my illness and just everything about me. Now, if anyone's going to hurt me/criticize me, i'm gonna stand for what's right. If you hurt or criticize me, that clearly means that you're doing the same to God. I don't live to please anyone.

Love, farah

2011-01-17T07:03:00.000-08:00

My crazy bitch turns a year older today and she's the oldest among us all, hahahahaha old old old old! Kay shut up. Today was in fact a blast, it was called a surprise because it went well through out the lies and stuff, ohhhh noooooo. & she better take good care of that 'love' care bear because it's so cute that i feel like bringing it home :P

Despite d&t being a bitch today, ALL IS WELL! & cikgu nor, did you forget that we've got pidato that has to be done? Hahaha, wait that's okay if you do because i prefer group work.

& definitely you're the shit that weighs me down, pooooffff

2011-01-15T22:04:00.000-08:00

I never thought i'd stepped into Hong Kong for the very first time in my life. & that will be my first and hopefully not the last time i will be going there. Memories. I miss Ms loh, the most patient teacher i've ever met. She's been through with us all the way and knowing that we clinched a bronze award during syf'09 really teared her up. Now that she's gone, we would want to bring good news to her. Let's make this syf'11 a memorable one. It's my last year in school and this shall be the last year i will be participating in syf. No more drums, no more fun in band after this. Life moves on, that's sad.

Hi percussionist, you guys are awesome and we will definitely do awesome this syf! Please work hard and don't fool around anymore, tsk tsk tsk.<

PSSSSSTTTTT/ i miss miney mouse,she's so cute!

2011-01-10T06:37:00.000-08:00

Sometimes, i have to tell myself that you're nowhere near me anymore. It's like you're there, but you're not there kind of thing you know. This is not the end, i still have so many things to worry about. Thank God You're Not In My List Anymore, hah so proud to be able to say that now. Please go and don't ever come back, bye.

Anyway, i was in the hall this afternoon to be able to see how the O-level results were and the moment when i saw people crying, i wonder if that's tears of joy or disappointment. I can't imagine myself in their shoes, next year. I heard that many of the 5N's did not do very well and that's what scares me off. In fact,i can feel that motivation flowing strong through my nerves, telling me that i'll do even better this year. Please make O-level'2011 a pleasant one, although it's just a bit too early to say this.

Bye, i need an early night. Long day tomorrow.

2011-01-09T00:18:00.000-08:00

This is really touching. I wish i had this kind of mind set to live with.

It's great to be in Ngee Ann, you see. Speaking of which, i think i'm extremely interested in Film, Sound & Video where you get to experience being a director, produce your own movie and such. I really want to be in that kind of industry, i'm sure it'll be a great experience. Mass communication is another interesting course, where you get to be a DJ and play around with the equipments in radio stations, that'll be awesome! So what i'm aiming now is good grades for my O's so that i'll get through to the course i've really wanted.

All in all, i love NP more than SP because NP showed a good orientation by organizing everything so well as compared to SP.

2011-01-05T01:38:00.000-08:00

It's just the second day of school and i'm really tired already. Lessons were draggy today and i don't like and will never like my malay class. We have to do pidato and learn to work as a class together, oh please no way. So much of being a sec 5 student and now all this things is happening, greattttt.

Let's put that aside shall we? i just came back from school, had talent scouting and trust me, although i was just sitting there,teaching the sec one's to play and try the drum, its tiring. So tiring that i can still feel the tired-ness up till this moment. But it's fine though, so many cute guys, not as in mushy but really really adorable ones who's eager to learn the drums,awww.<

I love my class, i love my science teacher, i love my MATHS teacher(hahaha), i love my form teacher but too bad MT is not my thing i usually looked up to anymore,sigh. 5 months till the O-level malay starts,please pass by quicklyyyyyy. i can't take the class anymore,pfft

Kay, looking forward for tomorrow's SP open house. But i'm still very excited for NP open house this friday,hehehehehe

2011-01-03T21:48:00.000-08:00

Can i don't attend school tomorrow?

Just when i wanna be excited for it,something ticks me off and that is when i remembered that the best people i usually hanged out with won't be in school anymore. This is so depressing, sad and sometimes when i think about it, i really feel like tearing up. Not that i wanna be emo or whatsoever.. but yeah i'm going to miss every fun things we had in 2010. Now everyday is about to be all dull,with the same people i don't really talk to. I'm really hoping that tomorrow's gonna be fine without the best people.

AND THIS,will forever be kept in my heart.

2010-12-30T21:31:00.000-08:00

Thank you 2010, for the new friends i made, for the friends who stuck with me through thick and thin, for the people who just walked out of my life, for the people who broke my heart, for the people who made me happy. Most of all, thank you God, without you all this won't be happening.

PSSSSSSTTTTT, i love my band and i think i'm officially falling in love with a lovely song called, memories of friendship.

2010-12-28T05:50:00.000-08:00

Yes i am tired of being stepped on, of being looked down on, of being the laughingstock.
I can speak of difference,of a change, but nothing would happen without action.
But in this world, changes are only temporary,with only so many ears which would really listen.
People are losing respect, and we are losing hope.

2010-12-22T00:57:00.000-08:00

Hi, tell me when you're gonna stop hurting me.
This has been going on for awhile and i'm all patient still.

Please die.

2010-12-19T21:16:00.000-08:00

Hi, i don't know how to start this butttt.... i'm promoted.
I'm going to take my O levels next year, this is really a dream come true.
At least, for me because i've longed to have my O level cert in my hands.
2011 is going to be a tough one for most of us, it's a challenge i must say.
part of me is happy that i got through, but i'm afraid too.

Basically, next year is really different.
Nisa quoted; "what's school without 4N2, what's yuan ching without Mr gomez"
how trueeeeeeeeeeeee =/

I'll end this post with a picture of the most naughtiest,annoying..
yet very fun classmates!

2010-12-14T07:02:00.001-08:00

Ya Allah, the year is about to end soon and all i gotta say is, thank you for everything that has happened throughout this year, may it be good or bad. It happened because you've got the power to make it all happen.

Today is really a blissful day. Like what nisa said, after what seemed like years, we finally met up. It's a short one but it meant a lot, okayyyy.. at least for me ^.^ After all, besides family, i just need my friends too, like when i'm down and such, i want them to be there always. I've never met such wonderful friends before but you people, as in fiza, nisa, muhaiminah, seri, jess.. you people showed me what true friends are. We may be seperated after our results are out, but memories won't fade right? Ahhhh can't write much.. i can easily tear up.

You're just a memory,nothing more.

2010-12-09T08:10:00.000-08:00

Well, what you saw is only what i chose to show. I'm so like a real bitch in your eyes right now huh. Oh, i'm not offended neither am i sad to be called as that. More bitches is coming your way and by then you'll really know how it feels like when karma hits you real hard.

What goes around,comes around.

2010-12-08T07:56:00.000-08:00

Pictures above credits to Sabrina~

A 5 days trip to hong kong has never been enough, i mean really. Although food has always been the issue among the muslims, i'm glad we survived fully. It surprised me when i got to know that we're going to the mosque, like the only place with 'halal' food and people. Disney land was greatttttt! Especially the 'Lion king' show and the main thing that made us went all crazy, which was the space mountain. It's so fun with my fellow band members around.

I miss waking up to morning calls, i miss my room mates, i miss the beautiful sight-seeing places in hong kong which was plainly amazing, i miss our band clinic with Dr. thomas, i miss shopping, i miss everything i did in hong kong.

As for our competition, alhamdulillah, we clinched a silver award. We were so hyped up that we couldn't force our eyes to sleep despite having a long day the next morning. Awesome place with awesome peeps.

2010-11-30T00:10:00.000-08:00

WOOOOO WE'RE GOING HONG KONG TOMORROW?!! FOR REALLLLLLLL? hehehehehe, so here's 1/4 of what i've already packed in my bag..

My luggage is full of things and i can't barely squeeze some of the small items in. Ahhh so stress up but thank goodness mum's got a way to put everything in place so there's a little space left. We have to be in school by 5.30am so most probably i'll wake up around 4 plus to get everything ready. Dad promise to send me off to school together with my little sister(that is if she could wake up) hehehehe.

I'm a little sad to be leaving everyone in singapore, especially my lovely family members. 5 days without them is going to be real hard because i need them most of the time but i'm sure i'mma survive alone. Ok maybe not alone, i'mma survive with my room-mates! You guys better be fun okay, heh. Oh! not to forget my comfy bed. Its going to be a torture because i can't sleep soundly without my own, ok i repeat, my OWN pillows and bed.. I is a sad gurl. hahahahaha

Alright that's all. See you guys in five days time, may Allah bless you readers. PSSSS/ HI hong kong, see you in less than 24 hour's time!

2010-11-27T08:33:00.000-08:00

Well oh well...

i was a little shocked when i checked the calendar awhile ago. We're so near to december and that means 2010 is coming to an end soon. Look how fast time flies in a blink of an eye. It kind of scares me to actually realized that i'm 17 next year. I want a time machine now!! for goodness sake..

2010-11-26T08:49:00.000-08:00

4 more days, heh. Everyone's so excited about it, so am i.

I'm all grown up now and nothing beats the love you've showered upon me throughout the years i've lived. You're amazing and i truly know that i can never get someone like you. I've received countless of scoldings from you but none of it has ever made me hate you, not even close to that. I wish i could speak my problems out to you. Maybe yes, some of it but definitely not all of them. Although some times the words you used on me hurts a lot, you still mean a lot to me. All in all, you're the most beautiful women i've ever had. Happy birthday, mama. You know i love you, despite everything that has happened.

It's getting late and i better hit the sheets nowwww, heh.

2010-11-22T08:48:00.000-08:00

Band has been part of my daily life ever since N's over. I've been spending most of my time on band, nothing else. Not to say that i don't enjoy every practice that we have went through.. its just that too much of it can make me feel sick and tired. So today was rather an enjoyable session since Mr Er came down to help us out with our mulan and chorales piece. I'm glad we did improved. Speaking of which, i'm so addicted to Mulan, the 'reflection'. I don't know if this is going to be a good or a bad thing but yeah.

You're too good to be true.

2010-11-19T07:17:00.001-08:00

Does it hurt you to know that we haven’t spoken to each other in days? Does it hurt you to know we can’t look at each other without looking away? Does it hurt you to know that everything we once had, is gone? Does it hurt you? Because it hurts me..a lot.

-Tumblr

2010-11-17T08:51:00.000-08:00

15 November 2010 which was two days back, was really a great experience especially for Yuan Ching band because it was our very first concert. Everyone was so excited and at the same time nervous on how it's gonna turn out like. Seeing the crowds getting bigger and bigger made my heart beats a little harder. Our mulan piece was not up to standard yet but we did our best. What's in the past IS in the past. Percussionist did a great job, but like what suhana said, there's still room for improvement. Now that concert's finally over, its time to fully concentrate on our upcoming competition. 14 more days!!

Oh, Eid Mubarak everyone!

2010-11-11T00:01:00.000-08:00

JUST WHEN BOREDOM TAKES OVER...

Taken by just me, myself and i. My mum's garden,she's just so good at taking care of her own garden. This kind of things,is just part of her life.

Hahahaha i so need a life right now. I dont even know what on earth am i thinking or even doing nowadays. One moment, i can be really happy and the next moment, i can be completely sad which i dont even know why. Errmmmm this is life i guess. Lets just look on the bright side,farah.

2010-11-10T01:19:00.000-08:00

Sometimes i feel good whenever i'm on Tumblr. See that?
I wrote that myself on a lonely night because, i saw something online.
It broke my heart so i just thought of sharing it on tumblr
and that's what i saw the next morning and i was so glad that,
people feel me. People on tumblr feel me.
THIS IS JUST AMAZING! People on tumblr is just amazing.

I wish our band is this big. I wish we could play so well like them. I'm both excited and nervous for the concert on monday. Hoping for the best, though. InsyaAllah

2010-11-08T08:32:00.000-08:00

Ya Allah,i know this is a test from You.
I also know that You know i'm strong enough to go through all this.
Bless me, ya Allah.
Because that's what i need the most from You.
Now, right at this moment.

2010-11-07T23:23:00.000-08:00

Miley cyrus - stay

Haiyaaaa, why i feel so lifeless now. I love holidays but i'm starting to hate the fact that there's nothing i can do to fill up time. Currently stoning in front of the computer screen, with the television's on for i dont know what reason cos no one's watching it but i'm too lazy to grab hold of the controller and switch it off,heh. The two bahalols is out having fun while i'm here stuck at home. Never mind never mind, my turn will eventually come soon. Urgh. I have no friends to play with at home. My lil sister is so busy with her barbie dolls, talking to herself, running here and there. Ahhh see how boring my life gets? But thank goodness there's band tomorrow. At least i wont be rotting at home during this hour, just like NOW.

On a random note, i saw my primary 1 best friend, Amirah. She's a pretty lady now. i miss having a best friend. So far from what i know, she's the only one best friend i used to have but since she lived so far from me,we drifted apart. How sad can that be. Hmm i miss you, reallllyyyy.

Tumblr,luckily i've got you. You cheer me up a little. Love you, Mr tumblr.

2010-11-04T00:09:00.000-07:00

Instead of telling you how i feel and cry myself to sleep,
i sit on tumblr and post notes & pictures about it.

At least i feel better.

2010-11-02T08:05:00.000-07:00

Hi. i just gotta decide with which background should i choose for my desktop. haha so much of a fan for both hayley and katy. ahhh so hard to decide, ^.^

or even better..

hehehehe how about thattttt? i miss you girls sooo sooo sooo soo muchhhhh :(

2010-11-01T23:31:00.000-07:00

I got bored easily. I got sick of everything i do everyday.
Maybe i just need something fun to do so this boring feeling won't appear anymore. But can anyone like tell me what am i supposed to do? ahhhhh help meeeee!!!

All thanks to Mr er for teaching me some cheating techniques, HAHAHA. He's indeed a great instructor. Now i know that compassvale's band is under him, wow naizeeee.

Some typical fact about me; when i on the computer, my tabs will always be like this.. maybe everyone who has tumblr is likely to realize this too.

2010-10-31T06:20:00.000-07:00

More in facebook (:

A pleasant outing with my lovelies. Alhamdulillah, ya Allah. I was so striking today but hehe, i like. I like orange, i feel so confident today. More outing in time to come, insyaAllah. Psssssst; i love the book i borrowed,so gonna spent my time reading it real soon. yay-ness ^.^

2010-10-30T23:09:00.000-07:00

WOOOOOOO its finally saturday!!!

oh! but guess whattttt, i'm rotting at home. Except being on tumblr, reblogging cool and amazing stuffs, ive got things to do too, and those are like cleaning the house, clean my messy bedroom, folding of clothes and the list goes on. I'm done with all that. I'mma head to the library tomorrow to borrow some nice books to read and be a book worm. Naizeeeeeeeee! Its been long since i last spent some time on books. Been busy with my studies and i neglected the book i bought months ago. I'm that busy,you see hehehehe.

So lets see, there's one more day left before i got myself out of the house,err maybe 3 times a week for band. The journey is gonna start, i shall call it a tough one because i know within this 13 band practices during the month of nov,there's gonna be scoldings everywhere. Well,that's it. I'm gonna prepare myself for it, okay maybe i shall say, everyone in band have too. Just hope that my section members gonna work on their weaker parts and not be a fool all the times. Hahaha okay that's about our section, percussion. We slacked a lot because basically miss tan is going to be very busy with the rest of the section and we are so-called 'free' from her. Well,we're gonna show ms tan that without her guidance,we could do it the same as the rest of the performances that has been done throughout the years. Oh yay! we sure can do it, insyaAllah.

Hmmmmmmmmmm, i'm so bored!!! Define bored; dull,tiresome,or uncongenial person.Well thats me at the moment.

I wish i have the talent to take great, amazing, cool pictures. I'm so jealous of those who have good cameras and they obviously can take good pictures too! I want to be a photographer, explore the world with my own camera. Maybe take pictures of old couples,little children playing,sunset. Isn't it such a nice thing to do? & of course, i want to do it with someone. Hmm yeah someone whom i dont even know who (:

Lastly....

This is so trueeeee.

2010-10-26T22:13:00.000-07:00

Just thought of sharing. Looks like i'm not the only one who's addicted to this song. I see people sharing this video on fb too. hehehehehe baik.

I just got back from JW, alone. Forever alone. Topped up my card and get some things from my aunty's shop and back home. Ahhhh i feel like i have no life ever since N-level ended and since i've not been going to school. I wanna work but looks like my schedule's too tight and all my time is now for band. How pathetic ah, sad or whatttt. Some of my friends has already started working and i dont know how the hell it seemed so easy for them to get one. I've been searching but failed. Now that i feel like i don't have time to work, it clearly means that i have to stay at home. Stay at home = wake up, bath, do house chores, play computer, eat, sleep. Bagus farah, terbaik!

I'm waiting for another day out with fellow friends but i've no kachingssssss. This is what i meant when i say i badly need a job. I need monehhhhhhhh. Can you like drop from the sky? ahhh ya Allah.

Lastly, twitter. You irritated the shit out of me okay.

2010-10-24T10:42:00.000-07:00

Its 24th October, 1.43am

I'm still wide awake. Everyone's asleep. I hate being the only one who sleeps really late at night and results to waking up late the next morning. The thing is, not even any of my family members knows how i really feel when it comes to night. Yeah, the only time when my mind did some talking to itself and i'm all confused.

No one really feels. Not even my friends whom i know will be there for me through thick or thin. I envy those girls who owned a bestfriend. I want to know how it feels like to have a bestfriend whom listens. I wish, i just wish i had one.

I'm still waiting although i keep telling myself that you aint coming back.
Silly me. Or maybe people label this as 'unconditional love'? Idk.

2010-10-23T00:19:00.000-07:00

It feels so good to be back on track with my fellow section members. It's been long enough since we last laughed out loud together during our sectionals. I'm so glad we did had fun on thursday. I'm also in love with the new drum set but not with the colour though. I wish it was black because then it will look more classy, but nah its okay. I'm gonna train myself on it since yeah, hong kong's calling on us in less than two months time. I'm still practicing on Mulan and Chorale Jubiloso. So much of missing a lot of practices due to our N-level period.

After looking at these pictures..it makes me more excited. AHHHHHHHH!

Can't wait for december! <33333

2010-10-20T06:22:00.000-07:00

5 days course in Shatec is definitely a wonderful thing to do. I miss lectures although it can make me fall asleep in class. I miss the facilitator. I miss our cooking time(seriouslyyyyyy). I miss laughing out loud at the facilitator's jokes. I miss everything about shatec. I wish it could be extended longer but sadly,good things has to come to an end. I'm glad i did enjoyed myself there.

I've always wanted to try kite-flying long time ago but time doesn't allow me to. So yesterday was a joyful day for the three of us. At first, yeah no doubt, we sucked at it and we didn't managed to make our kites fly high up. Thank goodness two man came to our rescue! haha, okay whatever. Overall, it was a faithful day spent together. Can't wait for the next session though but its gonna be with fazira and farwizah. Ahhhhh, i miss that two like a lottttttt! We need to meet up soon. Real sooooon :(

On a lighter note; THERE'S BAND TOMORROW! soooo can't wait for it.

2010-10-17T08:34:00.000-07:00

Maybe its just my feelings but i donttttttt knowwwwwww. I feel so insecure. Allah, be with me. I need You the most, when it comes to this kind of thing. I need Your love, blessings to guide me through :(

Tomorrow is gonna be another day of pretending, great. You're so good at this farah, really good. Sigh.

I wish times like this,you're here.

2010-10-16T01:04:00.000-07:00

Well, this is what i've always wanted. I would if i could.

2010-10-12T06:25:00.000-07:00

I miss talking to you, knowing that you get and understand me. Everytime I talk to someone else, it just reminds me of how much they don’t.

With love, me.

2010-10-11T08:25:00.000-07:00

Finally, a huge burden's off my shoulders! Can i like jump for joyyyyyyyyyyyy? hehehe. Okay now, let me wish those who's gonna sit for their O's in like a few weeks time, the best of luck!

In the mean time, i can't wait to fly kite with my girls soon. REALLLLLLL SOOOOOOOON.

Okay bye.

2010-10-10T10:03:00.000-07:00

"I want a man who truly loves me for who i am when i'm with him, for the flaws i have that i couldn't change, for the hijab i wear everyday and for the looks Allah gives me."

Allah is with those who patiently waits.

2010-10-09T01:34:00.000-07:00

To the girls that made me who i am today. The girls who can be really nice and yet, mean sometimes. Its a great pleasure to have you two as my sister. Not to forget my cute 5 year old sister who never fails to cheer me up with her clumsy-ness. I dont need strangers to make me happy. I have my sisters and i know, they love me as much as i do. That's all i need.

To the wonderful girls i have met in school, really you guys are amazing. I still remember how we cracked up jokes and laugh our hearts out after recess at the forum. I miss..i miss all that. Maybe some things made us not as close as before but i really want you girls to know that somehow, you girls did enlightened my day. Truly, i wouldnt wanna lose any of you. I want the old 'us' back. I miss that, really miss that. All in all, thank you for being such a wonderful friend. I hope after N's, we will go out and have fun together, like we used to.

Not to forget also, my amazing 4N2 cliques. We may be seperated but you guys have been such great classmates and yet, annoying. May all the memories be kept, deep inside me. Love you, 4N2! <3

Lastly, i've been hurt many times. I'm not gonna let myself hurt again. I might not be as weak as it may seems but truly, every night was a disaster for me. I hope you know what you're doing. My heart is still as wide open as it was before. Please come back, if you feel like you want to.